To Everyone

I have not wanted to write what I am about to say on this blog and that is why it has taken me a few days to try and adjust a little, but Friday we went to our Oncology appointment we thought to discuss our treatment options and found out far more then we wanted to at this time.

The doctor could tell Jon's cancer was still progressing because of the measurement growths that seemed to have doubled in just over a week even though we were taking the Temadar chemotherapy. We were hoping to seek additional advice on treatments, but the doctor could tell how weak Jon had gotten and sick since the last visit which was about two weeks ago. He thought Jon had a Pulmonary Embolism because his heart rate for the last week has been in the 130's-140's and his oxygen saturations in the 80%.

He said he wanted to do a CT scan in order to diagnoses the Pulmonary Embolism and the best option would be to check into the hospital and get it done faster while Jon got to just rest in bed. So we said fine and checked into the fourth floor and I went home to gather up things and get a doggie sitter for the dogs.

Well I could tell something was wrong when I came back to the hospital because Jon's parents were there and everyone had teary eyes including Jon. At that point Jon told me that our doctor had come in a little while before and the results were not good. The doctor told Jon that it was not a pulmonary embolism affecting his breathing and heart rate, it was the cancer.

The cancer had grown so much these past couple of weeks that it now completely enveloped both lungs, is pressing on his heart and all the main arteries suppling his brain and upper arms. Jon can hardly swallow at this point because of two tumors in his neck. The doctor said he was so sorry and that the cancer was to progressed to go any further with treatment even if he had any to give, which he didn't.

So We came home on Hospice and said goodbye to Huntsman and to our doctors. We are praying for understanding of why this has occurred and know it must be for a very good reason. Jon is needed on the other side very much and has to leave us, even though I just can't believe it and don't understand one bit.

I feel mad and frustrated that we didn't have more time. We have been fighting this cancer for 6 good, hard long months and still nothing has been able to stop or even slow it down. Jon thinks that Heavenly Father has answered our prayers and granted us more time together here on earth and that a miracle has taken place. He feels like that is the reason he is still alive right now and the doctors couldn't explain why he is still even breathing with so much cancer. I guess he is right, it just wasn't exactly the time I was thinking of.

Jon would like to see anyone who would like to see him. The doctor has given him maybe a few weeks left of life and so time is precious to us, but if you would like to stop bye for goodbyes all friends and family are welcome to come for a short visit. I would like everyone to call ahead of time, just to make sure Jon is feeling up to it. He is very tired and weak. If you don't have our phone number please just email me or call my sister Kristen at 801-222-9506.

Thank you everyone for your loving support you have shown us through our battle. We please ask to continue your prayers on our behalf and ask The Spirit to be with us and to comfort us. I am trying to take one hour at a time and pray for strength and support from Our Father in Heaven. We love you all and ask for the spirit to be with you all as well.

Truly Your Tiffany