Monday, March 15, 2010

To Everyone

I have not wanted to write what I am about to say on this blog and that is why it has taken me a few days to try and adjust a little, but Friday we went to our Oncology appointment we thought to discuss our treatment options and found out far more then we wanted to at this time.

The doctor could tell Jon's cancer was still progressing because of the measurement growths that seemed to have doubled in just over a week even though we were taking the Temadar chemotherapy. We were hoping to seek additional advice on treatments, but the doctor could tell how weak Jon had gotten and sick since the last visit which was about two weeks ago. He thought Jon had a Pulmonary Embolism because his heart rate for the last week has been in the 130's-140's and his oxygen saturations in the 80%.

He said he wanted to do a CT scan in order to diagnoses the Pulmonary Embolism and the best option would be to check into the hospital and get it done faster while Jon got to just rest in bed. So we said fine and checked into the fourth floor and I went home to gather up things and get a doggie sitter for the dogs.

Well I could tell something was wrong when I came back to the hospital because Jon's parents were there and everyone had teary eyes including Jon. At that point Jon told me that our doctor had come in a little while before and the results were not good. The doctor told Jon that it was not a pulmonary embolism affecting his breathing and heart rate, it was the cancer.

The cancer had grown so much these past couple of weeks that it now completely enveloped both lungs, is pressing on his heart and all the main arteries suppling his brain and upper arms. Jon can hardly swallow at this point because of two tumors in his neck. The doctor said he was so sorry and that the cancer was to progressed to go any further with treatment even if he had any to give, which he didn't.

So We came home on Hospice and said goodbye to Huntsman and to our doctors. We are praying for understanding of why this has occurred and know it must be for a very good reason. Jon is needed on the other side very much and has to leave us, even though I just can't believe it and don't understand one bit.

I feel mad and frustrated that we didn't have more time. We have been fighting this cancer for 6 good, hard long months and still nothing has been able to stop or even slow it down. Jon thinks that Heavenly Father has answered our prayers and granted us more time together here on earth and that a miracle has taken place. He feels like that is the reason he is still alive right now and the doctors couldn't explain why he is still even breathing with so much cancer. I guess he is right, it just wasn't exactly the time I was thinking of.

Jon would like to see anyone who would like to see him. The doctor has given him maybe a few weeks left of life and so time is precious to us, but if you would like to stop bye for goodbyes all friends and family are welcome to come for a short visit. I would like everyone to call ahead of time, just to make sure Jon is feeling up to it. He is very tired and weak. If you don't have our phone number please just email me or call my sister Kristen at 801-222-9506.

Thank you everyone for your loving support you have shown us through our battle. We please ask to continue your prayers on our behalf and ask The Spirit to be with us and to comfort us. I am trying to take one hour at a time and pray for strength and support from Our Father in Heaven. We love you all and ask for the spirit to be with you all as well.

Truly Your Tiffany

15 comments:

  1. WOW! What do you say to a post like this? I'm so sorry for all your going thru and will pray that Heavenly Father will be ever present in your home the next few weeks to help you get thru this time!!! God Bless your Family!

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  2. So sorry that you have to go through all of this. There must be something very important waiting for him to do. We're praying for some peace for you all. ♥

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  3. Tiffany, I would love to help you out in any way I can. I would be happy to dog sit (I have a shih-tzu and a big back yard that he loves to play in) and it would be so easy. I would also love to watch your kids any time you need! I'm free all day and Jacob would love the playmates so feel free to give me a call. Spencer and I will surely be praying for you and your family. Yours and Jon's testimony is so touching and inspiring. Thank you for sharing.

    Jamie Taylor (from the ward)
    801-310-2878

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  4. Jon and Tiffany. I am so sorry.
    You are in our prayers. May our Heavenly Father send peace and comfort to your family.

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  5. i love you guys all so much! your all in my heart every minute of every day...your such an amazing woman tiffany, and jon has always been such a wonderful guy. your beautiful little family will be together forever, i love you again.

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  6. I'm grateful for the short visit we were able to have today and I pray that the Lord's comfort will be upon you and your beautiful kids in the terribly difficult time. You have my number and if there is anything you need, do not hesitate to call.

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  7. I know you don't know me, but when I read this post I just wanted to cry. I can't imagine what a hard and difficult thing this is to go through. I have had 3 grandparent die of cancer and I know it is an ugly thing. I am so sorry that you are dealing with this! I will keep you in my prayers and I hope that you can feel some comfort in this time of need.

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  8. Tiffany, you and your family are in our thoughts and prayers. I hope you can continue to find peace and understanding.

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  9. I feel honored to have been able to meet you and your family last night. Please feel free to contact any one of us if there is anything that we can do to help you through this very difficult and heartbreaking time. You are loved and prayed for often. You have my contact numbers and I would love to help out in any way possible. May God bless you all and may his angels watch over your family always. Love, Adele Bancroft

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  10. Tiffany, there is nothing I can say that is going to help or comfort you. I just wanted to tell you that I'm here. I am so sorry for all you and your family are going through and I hope you will all be comforted. Love, Calie

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  11. Tiffany, I don't know what to say, at this time other than, We love you and want you to know that you and your family are in our thoughts and prayers at this time. I pray that you will find peace and understanding. If you need anything, anything at all, DeeAnn has my number. Let her know and I will be there.

    Much Love,
    Kym Flanagan

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  12. Tiffany you don't know me, but I know your heartache as my aunt passed a month ago from cancer. It is such a hard thing to understand. I pray that you will find peace.
    May heavenly father bless you and your family.
    Sincerly,
    The Harris Family

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  13. Oh Tiffany, i am so sorry for you, I am praying for you and your family daily. Your faith and courage through this are amazing, love you lots!

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  14. Tiffany,
    I've miss you and your family since we've moved. I am truly sorry about this sad news. I am impressed by your faith and I will continue to pray for you and the family. If I've learned anything from reading your blog is that life is so precious and family is the most important thing in life. You are an example to me and pray that you'll find peace with everything soon. I'm so glad I got to know you and your family.

    Telisa Murray

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  15. Jon and Tiffany,
    What a heart break. You are both such amazing people and I can feel your love through your writing. I'm so happy that families are forever and you will be together always. You and your sweet children are always in my prayers. I love you all.
    -Melissa Birkeland

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